I’m there.

Even though we will be separated

By red lights and highways

A mobile silence that tread along

With the sound of the car engine

The cushioned seat beneath my thigh

Gently shaking

.

As soon as the door slams shut

We are at two different places.

.

When I sit at the dining table, alone,

Playing with my food like a sullen kid

Holding my cell-phone to my breast

Anticipating its sudden vibrations

And the way they tear at my clothes

And scratch across my skin

.

Know that every minute

I stand beside your bed to protect you

Know that every minute when

Your eyes are closed

And your mind dreams a strange dream

That lasts forever

That lasts from the moment your eyes are closed

Until your eyes open

That lasts a few seconds, a few long minutes

.

It is a rope around my neck

Dragging my lifeless body

Across a road of slow, poisonous frost

,

Know that when I don’t say I love you

Before I leave

Is because those words pull out tears

Like an unclosed wound oozing out

An unstoppable river of blood

.

Know that every second that you lay

A fierce warrior in your own universe

No matter how small the battle you think it is

Or you say it is

.

Know that I am there to fight with you

And will fight for you

Know that in your blackness

I am holding your hand

As that surgery blade falls

And that every cut

From that surgery blade

Falls, too, on my heart.

 

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2 comments

  1. contemplativemoorings · October 15, 2010

    We’ve all been there…felt like I was right back there reading this…

  2. Carol Ann Hoel · October 12, 2010

    Lots of emotion in these verses. Hurting people isolated from one another by a circumstance that threatens life and relationship. Blessings to you…

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